I don't have an answer for that...

24 weeks!!! Viability!!! This is a big deal. Not that I want our babies to arrive any time soon but if for some reason they do, they would have a chance to survive. I thought about this point a lot when were in our scary weeks 10-18. I am still feeling good but feel like I don't have answers to A LOT of questions. The Lord has been slowly teaching me to let go of my need to control everything in my life. He has used desperate financial situations, my weight loss (and weight gain), Ben losing his job, ME losing my job, struggles to start a family and pretty much every day activities as well.I am much better than I was but I still struggle with control and I LOVE always having the right answer.

Nothing makes you feel more out of control than the journey to get pregnant and pregnancy itself. I am reminded of this lack of control when people ask me questions that I feel I should have the answers to. Most of these questions are based out of curiosity so here are some common questions with or without answers. ;o)

Wow, you are already pretty big. How big are you going to get?
The books say that I will be huge...larger than I can physically imagine at this point. I feel bigger every day and I already feel like my stomach is totally stretched. The Dr. said that I am measuring about 5 weeks ahead which is right on track for twins. I look more like I am 29 weeks. See picture below!

When is your due date? 
This is a tricky question...if I was having one baby, it would be June 1st. Since we are having twins, the absolute latest the Dr. will let me go is 38 weeks which would be mid-May. My gut (an optimism) tells me we will have them the first week of May.

Will they need to be in the NICU?
I don't know and I pray they don't. On average, twins are born at 35 weeks which usually lands them in the NICU for a short period of time. This obviously depends on each of their health at the time of birth. Generally, if they weigh at least 5 pounds and make it to 36 weeks, we should be able to avoid the NICU. We won't know until that day comes.

How much weight will you gain? 
I don't know. The Dr. told me to expect 45-55 pounds by the end of it all. I have already gained 25 pounds which is just fine based on the fact that I "started with a little extra."Words from my very honest, yet sensitive doctor. It is weird because I have been this weight (and more) before but my body feels and looks so different. At the end of the pregnancy I will likely weight the same as my highest weight back in 2010. Mentally, that actually has helped me visualize and trust that I will be able to lose the weight again.

Are you going to go back to work after they are born?
Yes! This proud Momma brings home the bacon in this family and I also LOVE my job. We are slowly starting to work out childcare. Paying for 2 infants in a daycare is absolutely insane. It would be cheaper to hire a nanny to come to our house. We will be looking at other options. Ben works at the YMCA which allows him to bring the kids to the childcare there for up to 3 hours a day which is a huge help and he may also stay home one day a week. My wonderful Aunt has offered to help one day a week while I work at our Apple Valley location. One of our sweet friends in our small group has offered to come help 1-2 afternoons a week. We have a few options here but are very thankful for the help from family and friends. I also work from home most days which means I am there to basically feed them but there is no way I can get work done with two little ones.

Are you going to have a vaginal birth or c-section?
I don't know and in all honesty...I am not sure how much of a choice I will have. So much of this process has been out of my control and not at ALL like I imagined. My original goal was an all natural birth but that went out the window when we saw 2 heartbeats. My babies will decide our options based on their position...more specifically, baby girl with decide. If she is head down...there is a shot at a vaginal delivery. If not, off to the operating room we will go. If they are both head down, we are in a better spot but Baby Boy can always change his mind. Also, at ANY time they could be in distress and a c-section could happen in minutes. Either I go in with a c-section plan or we flip a coin and deal with many scenarios during the most stressful time of my life. Other factors include how far along we are, how big/healthy the babies are and my paid leave is 2 weeks more with a c-section. I hope for more insight after our prenatal classes.

Will you breastfeed?
Lord, I hope so. Do you have any idea how much it costs to feed 2 babies formula? I will give it my all and I am prepared for it to be difficult. I may end up just pumping for one of them or both. We will have to see but I am determined to do this for as long as I can for health and financial reasons.

What are their names?
I DO know this answer but we are not telling anyone, and I mean anyone, until they are born. Ben won't even let me tell total strangers. When we first found out we were pregnant and we weren't telling the world. I would tell total strangers like the cashier at the grocery store that we were pregnant. My grandma had to keep this secret as well, which I know was REALLY tough for her but I let her tell the Schwanns man when he came to her house so she could tell at least one person.

What are your cravings? Are you hungry all the time?
Oh how I waited for the day when I could eat freely! Oddly, I am not that hungry. This may be the first time in my life that I don't have an appetite. It may be the fact that my stomach is squished and I feel like I am full all the time. I have been careful to not gain too much weight but more importantly getting the babies what they need. My stomach is prime real estate right now and I can only fit so much in there. Cravings are a funny thing...if I craved them before I was pregnant, does that count as a pregnancy craving? The only new one is fruit loops! I have bargained with myself and in the morning I mix a small amount of fruit loops with my Cheerios. It is a win-win then!

What does it feel like with 2 of them in there?
Since I have nothing to compare it to, it feels normal to me. I will say that at some point in the past few weeks, I find myself wondering if there are 3 in there? They move all over the place and in all corners of my stomach. From what I can tell Baby girl is permanently using my bladder as a trampoline and Baby boy has an every other day high activity. We haven't have an ultrasound in almost 4 weeks so I have no clue what their positioning is which means some days I can't tell who is moving around.

Weird things people say and my own Public Service Announcement:

Do twins run in your family?

People don't realize what they are actually asking when they say this. What you are REALLY saying is..."Did you conceive these children naturally or with medical help?" #1) I don't go around asking people what position they were in when they conceived their child??? #2) Funny response is "Only if they are being chased" #3) Actual answer is Yes...Ben and I both have twins on both sides of our family. My point is...don't ask people this.

Are you excited? (imagine scared look on their face)
(EXTREME Sarcasm here) No, we are super disappointed...but it is too late to send one back! (End Sarcasm) Are you serious people? Of course we are excited, these are our children!! God blessed us with 2 beautiful babies instead of one. In the world of fertility we hit the JACKPOT! Yes, we are excited...are we also scared, nervous and unsure of a million logistics...yes.

Twins are really expensive...good luck!(insert eye roll)
Yes, I am aware that babies cost money. God has brought us to this point with financial provision and I am sure he wouldn't have created these two babies without planning for their provision as well. I am also the master of stretching every dollar!  I saved over $200 at babies"r"us when purchasing 2 cribs and 2 mattresses! We will make it work.

That is the end of my PSA/Q&A session. Memorable moments time!

Ben finally felt Baby Girl kick this week! My stomach now moves when they kick...crazy!
We have purchased cribs, mattresses, changing table and a pack-n-play. ALL at great prices!
I find myself missing my family SO much right now. I try to think of reasons to call my mom just to talk to her. Bless her for listening to all my bodily function issues.
I love singing to the babies...we sing along to KTIS every day.
Ben has started reading to my belly so that the babies can get to know his voice.

                                                                           24 Weeks

                                                Yes...I know that I am this big already!