The date on the orange juice

I was getting my orange juice, which I drink every morning, when I noticed the date on the carton.

May 5, 2014

It just hit me that we could have babies by then or very soon after. May 18th is the very last day I would be pregnant and the time is going by much faster now. The reality is setting in that in the very near future, Ben and I will be given 2 very little humans to bring home for good. We finished our prenatal class for multiples last week and even though it was very informative, we still feel like there is so much more to learn. I guess the majority will be "on the job training."

The babies are moving so much more and they are more controlled movements. Think of stretching verses kicking. I could watch my stomach move for hours. Since we have no idea when this pregnancy will end, I am trying to savor every single day. I know that I will miss being pregnant and I am almost positive that this will be our one and only pregnancy. Here is a short list of my favorite things about being pregnant...

1) I don't have to suck it in...at all! I can remember sucking in my stomach for pictures when I was even a little kid. My body type has caused me to always think about how my stomach sticks out but during this time...the bigger it looks the better!

1.5) You would think that eating whatever I want would make this list but that hasn't been the case. When you are having twins, nutrition is a  BIG deal. This is more so for women who are underweight or petite...haha, I am not in that category.Every book I read at first was about eating the right foods to get your babies to grow big enough to help them survive. I was also aware from the beginning that I would be gaining 45-55 pounds. When we were hoping for one baby, I was determined to gain no more than 20 pounds (which would be healthy for my beginning BMI) but things change. Yes, I eat a donut now and then without massive guilt but I think about all that I eat. I try to ask myself, "If I knew they were going to be born tomorrow and only weighed 3 1/2 pounds each...would I still eat this or would I choose something else?"

2) The way strangers smile at you. People (mostly older people) seem to feel joy when they see a pregnant person. My favorite strangers are the ones who know or have twins. They are so excited for me and tell me all the wonderful things about twins. They also tell me that all the hard work it worth it. Some strangers feel the need to feel bad for us, warn us about the hard work, sleepless nights and so on. I have been amazed at the negative things people will say...but they have no idea how long we have prayed for a family.

3) I am a walking (waddling) example of a double miracle from God. I was an example of his grace, love and forgiveness before but now my body is showing his greatest miracle of all. I don't know how you can feel a baby move inside of you and see a newborn baby and not believe in God. This is His masterpiece in the making. Soon we will have those 2 miracles out in the world but there is something special about feeling God work inside of my body to grow these babies.

4) Finally, the way this pregnancy has helped me to let go of control and trust in God more than I ever imagined. Trusting that God will answer your prayers and trusting that he won't take those answered prayers away are two different levels of trust. I can't trust my body, my doctor, modern science or my intuition. He is the only constant. Ben and I walked through the ER last week on our way to be monitored last week. The same ER that we went to in the middle of the night at 10 1/2 weeks. The scariest night of both of our lives when we thought we would lose one or both babies. I couldn't even tell you what my prayers were that night but I had to trust that we would be ok. At that stage, I was prepared for the worse but now...I couldn't imagine and luckily I don't have to. Even if they were born tomorrow, they would very likely be perfectly fine after a few weeks in the hospital. We would still have our children, our family. I know that this is all in preparation for me to continue to trust Him as we enter parenthood.

We spent a lot time this weekend getting the nursery ready and sorting through beautiful gifts and clothes that people have given us. We also took our maternity pictures! Another milestone...bringing us closer to their arrival.

Below is my 30 week picture...you may notice I look a little tired because I AM! We have been so busy lately and it was another long weekend but we had to get the picture taken!

 To see the progression from the beginning, click on "Bump Pictures"